[Chapter 061] He simply wanted to hug him at this moment
The both of them soon returned to the house.
Lu YunFei looked at his watch and saw that it was getting close to 9pm. He asked Bian JinYuan, “Ready to sleep?”
Bian JinYuan thought that it was still early, but since Lu YunFei had asked, he readily replied, “Sure.”
He brought Lu YunFei to an inner room, “This is my small aunt and didi’s bedroom, you’ll…”
“I can’t,” Lu YunFei quickly refuted the offer, “How could I sleep on your aunt’s bed? This is not appropriate, I’ll just sleep with you.”
Bian JinYuan was startled. He had initially planned to say, you’ll sleep on my bed outside while I’ll sleep here, but he hadn’t thought that Lu YunFei would produce an option C.
Bian JinYuan didn’t know what came over him, but he quietly swallowed his initial suggestion to say, “Then come out with me.”
They went back to the room they came in from. Bian JinYuan pulled back a curtain to show a bed which wasn’t large, about 1.2 metres long. Lu YunFei thought, so this is where Bian JinYuan sleeps – he had always assumed that it was a blind spot when he was a Tmall Genie.
When Bian JinYuan saw the bed, his head cleared as well. This bed was sufficient to contain him, but now that Lu YunFei was here, it was definitely too narrow. Lu YunFei would probably be unable to sleep well.
“It’s too small,” he said, “forget it.”
Lu YunFei went around him to sit on the bed, “No, I want to sleep here.”
“It would be too squeezy for two people, you’d probably be unable to sleep well.”
“I haven’t tried sleeping on it yet, how would you know? Perhaps I’d sleep really well,” Lu YunFei rebutted.
Bian JinYuan saw his stubborn refusal and couldn’t help it, so he arranged the sheets and poured some water for him to wash up.
After Lu YunFei washed his face and feet, he spied the red Tmall Genie on the drawers. He walked over to command, “Tmall Genie~”
“I’m here,” the familiar machine voice responded.
I’m about to change shifts with you, Lu YunFei thought, are you happy at the thought of ending your shift? He petted the Tmall Genie.
Bian JinYuan asked, “Do you wish to play with it?”
“Nah. Is your Tmall Genie interesting?”
It was another loaded question.
The honest student Bian JinYuan answered: “It’s quite interesting.”
“Then do you like him?”
“I’m quite fond.”
Alright, Lu YunFei nodded, your life is spared.
He removed his clothes to prepare for sleep, and only made a realisation after he removed his coat, “You’ve got to lend me a set of pyjamas, I can’t sleep without pyjamas.”
Bian JinYuan searched in the wardrobe and found a clean set.
Lu YunFei received them and lifted his hand. With that action, he divested himself of the coat, showing his fair skin, blindingly white.
Bian JinYuan unconsciously looked down, unable to look at Lu YunFei. He walked over to pack up the things on the table, his mind unable to get away from the image of that fair skin.
Lu YunFei changed into the pyjamas and lay under the blanket. He looked up at Bian JinYuan, “You’re not sleeping?”
“Sleeping,” Bian JinYuan said in a low voice.
He regretted his words soon after uttering them. He had never been one to sleep that early, but now he was accompanying the young master to sleep. He wouldn’t be able to fall asleep at all.
He changed into his pyjamas, switched off the light, and lay on his bed after finding it in the dark.
A 1.2 metre bed wasn’t comfortably wide enough to accomodate two 1.8 metre tall boys. After some thought, he shifted to lay on his side in order to give Lu YunFei more space to sleep comfortably.
Lu YunFei hadn’t shared a bed with someone in a long time, and felt a little excited.
“It takes ten years of cultivation to share the same boat journey, and it takes a hundred years of cultivation to share the same pillow. Bian Bian, we can be considered to have cultivated a relationship of a hundred years now.”
This skewed logic again. Bian JinYuan “Mmm”-ed in reply, considering it as acknowledgement.
“Then have you ever shared a bed and pillow with anyone else?” Lu YunFei asked curiously.
“No,” Bian JinYuan said, and then added, “My mum used to hug me to sleep when I was younger. I’ve slept alone ever since I grew older.”
Lu YunFei couldn’t put a lid on his curiosity now that he had mentioned his mother, “You just said that this is your small aunt and didi’s room…” he said softly.
Bian JinYuan was smart, he immediately understood what he meant.
He didn’t reply, turning subconsciously to lie on his back as he looked at the pitch black night.
Lu YunFei noticed his lack of response and didn’t feel like it was good to press on, commenting, “It seems that you seldom talk about your family.”
“It’s not much to talk about,” Bian JinYuan said calmly.
Lu YunFei turned to the side to look at him in the dark. He wanted to ask him more, yet he didn’t dare to.
Bian JinYuan felt his gaze and turned his head to look back at him.
This story was translated for free by m a n d a r i n d u c k t a l e s. d r e a m h o s t e r s . c o m
“Aren’t you uncomfortable like this?”
And so Bian JinYuan also turned to the side to face him.
The two shared a silence for a moment, and it was still Lu YunFei who broke it, “My mum had never hugged me to sleep before,” he said, “My mum said that I was very fussy when I was young and loved to sleep alone. I would start crying if anyone were to be beside me, and so I’ve slept alone since I was young.”
“Is that so?”
Lu YunFei nodded, “But I don’t think that’s accurate. When I went to summer camp in primary school and shared a tent with Li YuanQing, I slept so comfortably and didn’t make a fuss or cry about it.”
Bian JinYuan accurately pinpointed the key points, “You and Li YuanQing in a tent? You’ve known each other since you were young?”
“Mmm, I’ve also stayed over at his house before.”
Bian JinYuan lightly nodded, and buried Li YuanQing in his heart.
Lu YunFei had no idea that his good friend had been marked by his deskmate and continued to talk about some of his and Li YuanQing’s shenanigans when they were young. As he talked, he started to laugh at those memories. Bian JinYuan listened and couldn’t help but feel a certain sorrow that he had never seen that version of Lu YunFei before, nor had he participated in Lu YunFei’s experiences.
But, he thought, if time rewound and they had turned back into children, he wondered if he and Lu YunFei would have met as kids. Lu YunFei walked above the clouds, while he walked on the soil. Never to meet or encounter each other.
“Why are you only listening,” Lu YunFei complained, “You should tell me about your childhood too.”
“Nothing much to say,” Bian JinYuan replied.
“What do you mean by nothing much to say? Tell me, I want to hear it,” Lu YunFei pushed him, “don’t be shy.”
Bian JinYuan who had somehow been accused of being shy: …
He wasn’t shy, it was simply that he had nothing to contribute.
Bian JinYuan pondered, and then slowly started, “I used to live with my mum. After my mum passed away, I went to live with my small aunt and her husband. Unfortunately, he’s no longer with us.”
Lu YunFei’s heart seized. He hadn’t thought that his childhood was like this. He didn’t know what to say. It was as if every word was ineffective, yet he still felt sorry for the person in front of him. And so he silently reached out to hold Bian JinYuan’s wrist.
Bian JinYuan felt the warmth on his hand and smiled, “It’s nothing, all in the past. Like I said, I have nothing much to say.”
“I’m sorry,” Lu YunFei said. He shouldn’t have pushed Bian JinYuan to say it when he had stated that he had nothing much to say.
Actually, this could have been guessed at, otherwise he wouldn’t have dared to ask about it. But if that was the case, then why did he ask him to talk about it.
“I’m sorry,” Lu YunFei said once more. He felt that he was too immature, stubborn, misbehaving, and greedy. No wonder Bian JinYuan hadn’t wanted him to visit at first.
Bian JinYuan heard his guilt-laden apology and said softly, “It’s nothing, there’s no need to apologise. It’s not your fault.”
“I shouldn’t have made you talk about this,” Lu YunFei said.
Bian JinYuan sighed, “It’s nothing important, I had no issue talking about it.”
This story was translated for free by m a n d a r i n d u c k t a l e s. d r e a m h o s t e r s . c o m
Lu YunFei raised his eyes to look at him, but he couldn’t see his expression in the dark.
Bian JinYuan removed his grip on his wrist and gently held his hand.
“It’s nothing, it’s not a taboo topic. It’s just that I’ve always felt that I had no one to tell.”
Lu YunFei didn’t respond.
“Do you think that I’m pitiful?” Bian JinYuan asked.
Lu YunFei immediately refuted, “No.”
Bian JinYuan smiled, “I was very sad when my mum left. I had thought that I was very pitiful on that day. I’ve never had a dad, only my mum, and so I was pitiful when she was gone. But after that, my small aunt brought me to their home. She and her husband treated me very well. When my small aunt found out that she was pregnant, she even secretly came to look for me to ask if I could accept having a younger sibling. She had said, ‘We can wait another two years if Xiao Yuan doesn’t want it’”.
“At that moment, I could almost see my mum when I looked at her.”
“My mum and small aunt have very different personalities. The only characteristic that they shared was that they both love me very much. And so I’m actually not pitiful, nor do I think that I’m in need of pity.”
“Mmm,” Lu YunFei said softly.
“So, you also don’t have to pity me.”
“I don’t find you pitiful,” Lu YunFei said, “I just… felt sorry for you.”
Bian JinYuan froze.
Lu YunFei said softly, “It must have been very hard on you ever since you were young. I just thought that if we had met earlier, I could’ve helped you out a bit. At the very least, I could have accompanied you, so that you didn’t have to bear this alone.”
Bian JinYuan didn’t say anything, but he tightened his grip on his hand.
He felt a trickling warmth in his chest, as if his heart was at peace, yet bubbling with heat. He opened his mouth, but slowly closed it. He held Lu YunFei’s hand, thinking that he simply wanted to hug him at this moment. He didn’t need anyone’s pity, nor did he care about their judgement. But Lu YunFei’s sympathy set his heart alight. It felt so hot that he held Lu YunFei’s hand tightly, feeling that he was about to bubble over.
Lu YunFei was different. Bian JinYuan knew that he was the only one who stood out to him from a sea of people.
Lu YunFei felt the grip holding his hand increase in strength and sensed his emotional fluctuation. He wanted to hold Bian JinYuan’s hand back in response, but found that Bian JinYuan had held his hand so tightly that he couldn’t move.
He could only look at Bian JinYuan in the dark, silently accompanying him.
“Sleep,” Bian JinYuan said.
Lu YunFei closed his eyes and was about to drift off when he suddenly realised something. He turned to press on the light display of his watch on his other hand – 9.40pm! Lu YunFei was shocked. So he didn’t actually transmigrate into the Tmall Genie nearby? What was happening? At home, he would usually get sleepy when it got to 9pm, but now, he hadn’t even gone to sleep yet.
“What’s wrong?” Bian JinYuan asked after seeing him look at the time.
“Nothing,” Lu YunFei said dryly, “I was just looking at the time.”
“What time is it?”
This story was translated for free by m a n d a r i n d u c k t a l e s. d r e a m h o s t e r s . c o m
“Sleep,” Bian JinYuan said once more.
Lu YunFei replied with an “Oh”, but he still felt a little unsettled. He thought about the Tmall Genie nearby and tried to call out, “Tmall Genie.”
The other party didn’t reply,
It was Bian JinYuan who responded, “Why are you calling out for the Tmall Genie?”
“It’s not much,” Lu YunFei thought of an excuse, “I usually say goodnight to the Tmall Genie at home.”
Bian JinYuan didn’t delve too deeply into this excuse, and only said, “Then you can tell me instead.”
Lu YunFei played along, “Good night, Bian Bian.”
“Good night,” Bian JinYuan followed suit, “Fei Fei.”
Lu YunFei laughed. He rarely heard anyone call him this. His family called him Xiao Fei, and so to be called Fei Fei was something he wasn’t used to. But it wasn’t a problem, he thought. He would slowly get used to it, just like how he was used to being beside Bian JinYuan.
Lu YunFei closed his eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep in the quietness.
Bian JinYuan woke up when the morning sunlight shone into the room. He raised his hand to look at the time, but found that he was being hugged tightly by Lu YunFei.
Lu YunFei was still fast asleep, and his sleeping posture was different from last night’s. Lu YunFei was now virtually in his embrace. His head was nestled where his neck met his shoulder, with his hand and even a leg draped across him. Bian JinYuan looked at the sight and didn’t dare to move, lest he woke the person in his arms.
Lu YunFei seemed to be dreaming, and moved a bit. His lips grazed his pyjamas, like shooting stars burning a trail across Bian JinYuan’s skin, causing his chest to beat faster.
Bian JinYuan fixed his eyes onto Lu YunFei – his soft black hair, the slightly long pyjamas, and the lithe body underneath it. He moved his hand to lightly hug Lu YunFei.
At this moment, time stopped temporarily.
Bian JinYuan felt the heat emanating from his body, feeling as if the entire world had quietened down.
He hugged Lu YunFei gently and with restraint, silently looking at the young man in his arms. Occasionally, he closed his eyes to snooze, but would open his eyes after a few minutes to wait for him to wake up.
Lu YunFei woke up past 9am. As he woke, he nuzzled against Bian JinYuan’s chest for a long while, until Bian JinYuan had to memorise Chemistry formulas in his head. When Lu YunFei finally opened his eyes, he said to Bian JinYuan, “Morning.”
“Morning,” Bian JinYuan’s expression was calm, but his eyes were locked onto him.
Lu YunFei was still groggy after waking up. He rubbed his eyes and looked at the ceiling boards, not realising that he had woken up from within someone else’s embrace.
Bian JinYuan looked at him and asked, “Eating breakfast?”
Lu YunFei nodded, “What are we eating?”
“What would you like to eat?”
“There aren’t any places nearby which sell breakfast right?” Lu YunFei guessed.
“I’ll make it for you,” Bian JinYuan said gently.
Lu YunFei instantly woke up, “You’ll make it for me?”
Bian JinYuan smiled, “Don’t want to eat it?”
“Of course I’ll want to,” Lu YunFei declared happily.
He had never seen Bian JinYuan make food before. Lu YunFei felt that he had scored knowing that he was able to eat it on top of witnessing it.
“Go make it,” he pushed Bian JinYuan, as he sat up from the blankets, “I’ll watch you make it.”
Bian JinYuan also sat up. He pulled the curtains open and retrieved the down feather coat from the chair outside to place onto Lu YunFei’s shoulders, “What would you like to eat?”
“I’m fine with anything,” Lu YunFei said, “Make whatever’s most convenient for you.”
Bian JinYuan thought for a bit, “Then let’s eat something simple for breakfast. I still have dumplings at home, so I’ll cook them for you. We’ll have fried vegetables in the afternoon.”
Lu YunFei nodded, “Great.”
Bian JinYuan started to change out of his pyjamas. Lu YunFei followed suit and got out of bed, prepared to watch him make breakfast.
After the both of them washed up, Bian JinYuan took out a packet of milk from a drawer to let him drink something in the meantime.
Lu YunFei wasn’t picky and started drinking out of it.
“Aren’t you drinking?”
“You drink, I don’t like it,” he replied, and turned to look at Lu YunFei, “this is Shuang Shuang’s milk.”
Lu YunFei almost choked, “Then Shuang Shuang will scold me when he comes back.”
“He won’t, he likes you very much. Besides, he wouldn’t know how many packets there are.”
“You’re just shortchanging your didi like this huh.”
“Who am I doing it for?” Bian JinYuan looked back at him, and then suddenly moved closer to say softly, “Gege~”
Lu YunFei really choked this time. He coughed while Bian JinYuan helped to pat his back. Lu YunFei looked at him grievously.
Bian JinYuan was a picture of innocence, “Did I call you wrongly? Didn’t you ask me to call you that?”
Lu YunFei: …
Lu YunFei didn’t think that he still remembered that time when he told him to call him gege, and pleaded, “Dear god, please stop fooling around.”
Bian JinYuan cracked a smile, “Gege what’s wrong? Are you embarrassed?”
“Sigh, gege getting embarrassed is quite a cute sight.”
Lu YunFei silently held his forehead. How was it that Bian JinYuan had become weird when he woke up, God, please take this weirdo back! Bring back his kind, caring, proper, and cute teacher Bian!
Bian JinYuan had teased him enough, and took out the dumplings to bring out to cook them for Lu YunFei.
Lu YunFei followed him outside and watched him place each dumpling down, “What’s the filling?”
“Pork and vegetables,” Bian JinYuan replied, the most normal kind of filling.
“You wrapped it?”
“My small aunt and I did.”
Lu YunFei nodded, and waited to eat the dumplings.
Bian JinYuan didn’t cook too much as it was breakfast. After the both of them finished eating, he took the pot and bowl to the basin to wash. Lu YunFei also wanted to help, but he was coaxed back.
“I already said that I’m not that spoiled.”
“Mmm,” Bian JinYuan replied, but still didn’t allow him to touch the tap.
Lu YunFei was helpless, “Am I the pea prince to you? The kind who would be harmed by a single pea?”
Bian JinYuan turned to look at him, “If you wish, you can be.”
Lu YunFei was going to be frustrated to death by him, “I don’t wish to.”
“So you should head back into the house.”
“Bian JinYuan you’re really just so…” Lu YunFei pointed at him, and then let it down again, “stubborn.”
“So you shouldn’t try to argue with stubborn people, got it?”
Lu YunFei gave up, and could only chat with him as he watched him wash the dishes.
After dishes were washed, Bian JinYuan naturally started to supervise Lu YunFei in doing his English paper. After Lu YunFei had completed one, it was time for lunch.
Bian JinYuan took vegetables out from the fridge and brought them to the basin to wash before bringing them back home to cut into strips on the chopping board. Lu YunFei watched and occasionally exclaimed with “Wow, you’re so awesome,” while sneaking bites of a cucumber. He had never prepared a meal before, and excitedly shouted, “I would also like to try.”
Bian JinYuan handed him a vegetable knife and cautioned him, “Be careful, don’t cut your hand.”
Lu YunFei cut the piece of cucumber very seriously, turning it into almost equal sizes, just that the thickness of the pieces were completely varied.
He asked Bian JinYuan, “How is it?”
Bian JinYuan praised blindly, “Quite good.”
“What are you preparing to cook with this?”
“Not cooking it,” Bian JinYuan said, “Making a cucumber salad.”
Lu YunFei wasn’t picky, “Sure, make it.”
Bian JinYuan saw his expectant face and made the salad under his watch.
The other residents in the estate had also started cooking at this time, and greeted Bian JinYuan when they saw him cooking, to which Bian JinYuan replied indifferently. Everyone chatted as they made food, while Lu YunFei observed curiously. This was a scene which he had never experienced before in his life.
It was a lifestyle that he had never seen.
Perhaps because of the fact that they had made this food, Lu YunFei found this meal to be very satisfying. He finished his food, and not wanting to do homework, took out his phone to watch a show on, dragging Bian JinYuan to watch it together.
Bian JinYuan was afraid that he would get cold, so he let him sit on the bed and covered him with a blanket. The both of them moved a foldable table over to the bed and placed some snacks on it, eating them as they watched a movie. Bian Jie had bought some almonds before the new year, and Lu YunFei liked eating them, so his hands never stopped moving since the movie started. At the interesting portions, his hands finally paused as he concentrated on the movie. Bian JinYuan saw this and helped him to shell them.
He was originally going to place the peeled almonds in front of Lu YunFei, but after he thought of something, reached out towards his mouth.
Lu YunFei turned to look at him.
Bian JinYuan smiled, “Not eating?”
Lu YunFei opened his mouth confusedly, and then Bian JinYuan fed him the almond.
Lu YunFei: …
“Are you feeding a pet?”
“Then do you want to meow for me?”
Lu YunFei: ???!!! He’s a Tmall Genie, not an actual cat!
“You’re the cat.”
Bian JinYuan fed him another almond, “Watch your movie.”
“Don’t just feed me, you eat some yourself,” Lu YunFei suggested.
And so Bian JinYuan ate a piece.
Lu Yunfei saw this and didn’t think much of it as he continued to watch the movie, accepting Bian JinYuan’s feeding.
Bian JinYuan only retracted his hand after he had finished feeding the entire plate of almonds. He found this entertaining, and thought that he could find another time to feed Lu YunFei again.
After watching the movie, Lu YunFei started working on his homework. Bian JinYuan sat on the other side of the table, working on homework as well. The house was quiet, and the two people who were covered in blankets felt warm.
At night, Bian JinYuan made Lu YunFei some jiānbǐng. Lu YunFei asked him, “Is your small aunt coming back today?”
Fun trivia – the author used another word to describe these nuts that I translated as ‘almonds’ – ‘巴旦木’ (bā dàn mù, ‘Badam’). Seems that ‘badam’ is the Persian word for almonds. You can check out the image of an unpeeled almond in this Baidu article (in Mandarin). They kinda look like pistachios in their raw form! I didn’t know that almonds had a hard shell at first, and so I was very confused when the author described them shelling the almonds. I actually thought that Lu YunFei was removing the thin, bitter almond skins from the nuts like some health nut (hur hur).
This chapter was almost twice the usual length – I actually didn’t translate this in time today because I hadn’t factored for the amount of time needed, sorry! Good news is, the next chapter is another bonus double-length one too, just in time for Christmas!